What not to say in China

I soon found that my Mandarin was about the level of a toddler's. And looking Chinese enough in the face to be occasionally presumed a local, I must have given off the impression of being an enormous child, or some simple giant of lore. I saved myself from the worst embarrassments for the most part. At one dinner I checked with [his translator] Angela if my word for 'Miss' was correct for getting the waitress's attention. She was shocked by what I'd said. 'No, no, no, no, no! You must never say that!' I had come extremely close to shouting 'Oi! You old prostitute!" across the restaurant.

- Phil Wang, Sidesplitter, London, 2022