The Troubles

I used to go over to Northern Ireland a lot when I was doing standup in the '90s and my wife would say, 'Fred, when you're over in Northern Ireland do you mention the Troubles?' I said, 'What?' She said, 'Do you talk about the Troubles when you're on stage?' And I said, 'Listen, I think you'll find the people of Northern Ireland have got more to worry about than the lack of female orgasms in our house'.

- Fred MacAulay, The News Quiz, BBC Radio 4, 11 January 2013.